Be Still Beth
A place for my thoughts.
Sunday, April 17, 2011
I did it!!!!
I know it may not be the best looking blog out there but it's different and new. To me it is refreshing to see a difference. I hope to see a lot of different in my life. That is my goal as I think about my GOAL!!!
Help
April 17, 2011
I NEED HELP!!!!!!
I really want to change the way my blog looks and works for me. I feel like such a computer idiot. I need help. Can anyone tell me where to go to get a really nice blog appearance that is easy for someone like me. You know, someone who cannot figure out computer "stuff" without very much frustration.
AND everytime I decide to look at my blog and think I will start writing, there is this little box that appears and follows me everywhere and I CANNOT get it to go away!!!!
Can you tell I'm just a little frustrated. I want to write...but I want it to look nice and I want to know what I'm doing!!!!!
I NEED HELP!!!!!!
I really want to change the way my blog looks and works for me. I feel like such a computer idiot. I need help. Can anyone tell me where to go to get a really nice blog appearance that is easy for someone like me. You know, someone who cannot figure out computer "stuff" without very much frustration.
AND everytime I decide to look at my blog and think I will start writing, there is this little box that appears and follows me everywhere and I CANNOT get it to go away!!!!
Can you tell I'm just a little frustrated. I want to write...but I want it to look nice and I want to know what I'm doing!!!!!
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Hello World - 2011
2011
Fifty years ago this August 18th I was born into this world. God knew me before I was created, He knows how many hairs are on my head (even the grey ones I try to keep covered with color) and He knows how many days I have on this earth.
When I think of the days he has given me thus far, I think of how many have been wasted on absolutely nothing. I think of the most memorable days...some of the absolute best days and some of the absolute worst days. And more than either of those are the days I don't even remember!!!!
I can honestly say that I did not think I would be here, like this, in this place at this age. I thought I would be more of a grown up, act like a grown up, feel like a grown up. It just doesn't feel like I thought it would feel.
I'm at a new place in life. My children are grown, one graduates college in May and the other is married. My birth son will be 26 this year. Seriously. How do these things happen? They have lives of their own now and I am not defined by them any longer. How long has it been since I have been called "Zach's mom" or "Kristyn's mom". Quite some time actually. I think for the last year I have been in a kind of shock at the fact that my kids are grown and don't need me like they used too. It has been a huge adjustment for me but I think I'm finally coming out of the shock and realizing that this can be a good thing. I need to see this as the glass is half full not empty. Which brings me to this...
What will I do now. It's time to concentrate on what to do with the rest of the days the Lord has for me on this earth. To discover what He has for me, to discover who I am within myself and what do I really want out of this life. That is a lot of discovering.
In 2011 I hope to...(Mind you this is NOT a New Years Resolution, just some things I want to work on for the rest of MY LIFE)
Reconnect with God in a way I haven't in quite some time. I'm working at memorizing scripture this year...hard work for someone who can't remember yesterday at times. I know this will have to be intervention on His part for this to work :) I did memorize my first verse and am starting my second verse today. If you are interested in where I came up with this idea go to Beth Moore's website and look at the Siesta Scripture memorization part. Just google her!
Develop some new relationships and reignite some old relationships. I have been on some what of a sabbatical from relationships for a while. Because of things that have gone on in my life for the last few years, I just have not had the mental, physical or spiritual energy to do relationships very well. I miss that part of my life.
I know this is age old but I must become an adult when it comes to my health. You know those two ugly "E" words...Exercise and Eating right. Why can't I be one of you people that love to go for a run or work out and love to eat rabbit food everyday and not much of it at that!!!! How do I join this club and become a lifetime member...I have to find a way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just read over what I have written and see what I need. Someone that would like to be in relation with me, exercise with me and learn scripture with me and it could all be done at the same time. Hmmmm, interesting. Funny! I cannot even talk while exercising much less have conversation or quote scripture to someone out loud. It takes all I have to BREATHE!
I have crocheting to do and reading to do that have been on hold for a little while. I also have more movies to see this year. I so enjoy going to the movies and having popcorn with butter and I DON'T WANT TO GIVE UP MY POPCORN!!! I have my popcorn routine down to a fine art...and I really don't like for it to be bothered :)
I also hope to write more as I try to clean house with my mental and emotional self. Should make for some interesting writing.
Well old blog friend of mine, it's nice to catch up and maybe we will meet more often this year. It is my hope.
Fifty years ago this August 18th I was born into this world. God knew me before I was created, He knows how many hairs are on my head (even the grey ones I try to keep covered with color) and He knows how many days I have on this earth.
When I think of the days he has given me thus far, I think of how many have been wasted on absolutely nothing. I think of the most memorable days...some of the absolute best days and some of the absolute worst days. And more than either of those are the days I don't even remember!!!!
I can honestly say that I did not think I would be here, like this, in this place at this age. I thought I would be more of a grown up, act like a grown up, feel like a grown up. It just doesn't feel like I thought it would feel.
I'm at a new place in life. My children are grown, one graduates college in May and the other is married. My birth son will be 26 this year. Seriously. How do these things happen? They have lives of their own now and I am not defined by them any longer. How long has it been since I have been called "Zach's mom" or "Kristyn's mom". Quite some time actually. I think for the last year I have been in a kind of shock at the fact that my kids are grown and don't need me like they used too. It has been a huge adjustment for me but I think I'm finally coming out of the shock and realizing that this can be a good thing. I need to see this as the glass is half full not empty. Which brings me to this...
What will I do now. It's time to concentrate on what to do with the rest of the days the Lord has for me on this earth. To discover what He has for me, to discover who I am within myself and what do I really want out of this life. That is a lot of discovering.
In 2011 I hope to...(Mind you this is NOT a New Years Resolution, just some things I want to work on for the rest of MY LIFE)
Reconnect with God in a way I haven't in quite some time. I'm working at memorizing scripture this year...hard work for someone who can't remember yesterday at times. I know this will have to be intervention on His part for this to work :) I did memorize my first verse and am starting my second verse today. If you are interested in where I came up with this idea go to Beth Moore's website and look at the Siesta Scripture memorization part. Just google her!
Develop some new relationships and reignite some old relationships. I have been on some what of a sabbatical from relationships for a while. Because of things that have gone on in my life for the last few years, I just have not had the mental, physical or spiritual energy to do relationships very well. I miss that part of my life.
I know this is age old but I must become an adult when it comes to my health. You know those two ugly "E" words...Exercise and Eating right. Why can't I be one of you people that love to go for a run or work out and love to eat rabbit food everyday and not much of it at that!!!! How do I join this club and become a lifetime member...I have to find a way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I just read over what I have written and see what I need. Someone that would like to be in relation with me, exercise with me and learn scripture with me and it could all be done at the same time. Hmmmm, interesting. Funny! I cannot even talk while exercising much less have conversation or quote scripture to someone out loud. It takes all I have to BREATHE!
I have crocheting to do and reading to do that have been on hold for a little while. I also have more movies to see this year. I so enjoy going to the movies and having popcorn with butter and I DON'T WANT TO GIVE UP MY POPCORN!!! I have my popcorn routine down to a fine art...and I really don't like for it to be bothered :)
I also hope to write more as I try to clean house with my mental and emotional self. Should make for some interesting writing.
Well old blog friend of mine, it's nice to catch up and maybe we will meet more often this year. It is my hope.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Hello Blog World...I have a new job!!!!
I cannot believe how long it has been since I have blogged. I think about writing all the time but I either don't have my computer (Zach has it had it lately) or I'm to tired!
I have a new job!!! I started working at Bethany Christian Services about 3 weeks ago. For those of you who do not know, it is a Christian Adoption Agency. We work with birth moms and adoptive parents and adoptees. Its called the adoption triad.
It's kind of interesting. I have a friend in Louisville, Kentucky and a friend in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Both have gone to work for ministries of different kinds. This truly intrigues me. So, I began to pray that God would allow me to work at a ministry. The next thing I know I get an email from Becky, director, telling me about a job she has available and giving a description of the job. It was what I had prayed for. Does make me smile! We emailed and the rest as they say is history. God is faithful, even when I cannot grasp His faithfulness!
I have volunteered with Bethany for about 22 years and even worked there for a short time many years ago. I love the job and the ministry, of course it is so close to my heart.
The hard part has been getting up so early every day and making that commute to Little Rock. It takes me almost an hour to get there! Crazy! Who knows what it will be like when school starts. I just get my coffee from McDonalds and drink it on the way and listen to the radio or pray or talk to friends. I do not text though, I promise. I can't see well enough to text!
I work Monday and Wednesdays 8:30 - 5:00 and Tuesday and Thursdays 8:30 - 12:30. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I go to my job at the church where I do their books. So between the two I'm working almost full time. It has been a long long time since I have worked this much. But, I think it is good for me (would be better if I could sleep better at night)and if/when I go to 30 hours a week at Bethany I will qualify for insurance. This is a huge comfort to me!
On a side note, we are having an open house this Sunday the 15th. I'm praying for a buyer!!!
Just wanted to check in and maybe get started back writing. Have a great day!
I have a new job!!! I started working at Bethany Christian Services about 3 weeks ago. For those of you who do not know, it is a Christian Adoption Agency. We work with birth moms and adoptive parents and adoptees. Its called the adoption triad.
It's kind of interesting. I have a friend in Louisville, Kentucky and a friend in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Both have gone to work for ministries of different kinds. This truly intrigues me. So, I began to pray that God would allow me to work at a ministry. The next thing I know I get an email from Becky, director, telling me about a job she has available and giving a description of the job. It was what I had prayed for. Does make me smile! We emailed and the rest as they say is history. God is faithful, even when I cannot grasp His faithfulness!
I have volunteered with Bethany for about 22 years and even worked there for a short time many years ago. I love the job and the ministry, of course it is so close to my heart.
The hard part has been getting up so early every day and making that commute to Little Rock. It takes me almost an hour to get there! Crazy! Who knows what it will be like when school starts. I just get my coffee from McDonalds and drink it on the way and listen to the radio or pray or talk to friends. I do not text though, I promise. I can't see well enough to text!
I work Monday and Wednesdays 8:30 - 5:00 and Tuesday and Thursdays 8:30 - 12:30. On Tuesdays and Thursdays I go to my job at the church where I do their books. So between the two I'm working almost full time. It has been a long long time since I have worked this much. But, I think it is good for me (would be better if I could sleep better at night)and if/when I go to 30 hours a week at Bethany I will qualify for insurance. This is a huge comfort to me!
On a side note, we are having an open house this Sunday the 15th. I'm praying for a buyer!!!
Just wanted to check in and maybe get started back writing. Have a great day!
Monday, May 10, 2010
May
May 2010. How does time go so quickly...each year passing like Christmas morning. The world refuses to stand still for anyone but God alone. No matter the happy times, sad times, devastating times, the world continues to move on. People continue to move on. It is the right thing to happen but sometimes wouldn't it be nice if we could all just stop for a moment and breathe. Just take in what is around us, enjoy the ones we love, be rid of the anger or resentment that we might have in our hearts. Just be still and wander in God's Glory. Believe that He loves us, each one of us. More than we can fathom, if you are a Mom, can you imagine He loves us more than we love our own children. Here is the kicker, He wants us to love Him more than we love our own children. Can I do this? It is my desire. It is my desire to put Him first.
It has been a long long time since I have felt this way. I feel like I have been walking in the dessert for the past 2.5 to 6 years. I cannot imagine 40 years. I latch on and am ready to be in a daily walk and something happens and I fall off. I commit to what He wants me to do, something bad happens and I fall and think ok God, I know you can't use me now. But, He says come on back, tie yourself back to me, we will use this as part of your story too. He never turns His back on me. He longs for me to get that He is not going to leave me nor forsake me. When will I believe and trust Him for this. What could He do with me if I would only completely surrender, wholeheartedly.
The time is now, will I act? How about you and how about me, do you/I feel the deep longing in our souls to be sold out 100% to the ONE that loves us more than any other? Is there a purpose in your/my life that we know God has given us? Have you/I stepped out in faith and just jumped off the cliff and been set free? Could today be the day for you/me? He does not fail, He will catch us and He will set us free, you and I, we just have to be willing.
"Your name and renown (fame) are the desire of our hearts. My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you." Isaiah 26:8-9
It has been a long long time since I have felt this way. I feel like I have been walking in the dessert for the past 2.5 to 6 years. I cannot imagine 40 years. I latch on and am ready to be in a daily walk and something happens and I fall off. I commit to what He wants me to do, something bad happens and I fall and think ok God, I know you can't use me now. But, He says come on back, tie yourself back to me, we will use this as part of your story too. He never turns His back on me. He longs for me to get that He is not going to leave me nor forsake me. When will I believe and trust Him for this. What could He do with me if I would only completely surrender, wholeheartedly.
The time is now, will I act? How about you and how about me, do you/I feel the deep longing in our souls to be sold out 100% to the ONE that loves us more than any other? Is there a purpose in your/my life that we know God has given us? Have you/I stepped out in faith and just jumped off the cliff and been set free? Could today be the day for you/me? He does not fail, He will catch us and He will set us free, you and I, we just have to be willing.
"Your name and renown (fame) are the desire of our hearts. My soul yearns for you in the night; in the morning my spirit longs for you." Isaiah 26:8-9
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